BBQ Beef Ribs

I have the special relationship with barbecue beef ribs. It is my weakness; as much as I try to control myself in front of a plate of ribs, I just can't. It just tastes too good. I don't even WANT leave them alone. There's absolutely not one part of me, down to my cells, that wants to say no to a plate of barbecue beef ribs.

Now because it takes a lot of cooking time, you have to clean them, separate them, make a rub or marinade and then put them on the grill all takes a lot of time and effort before you can actually EAT them. It's a thing. So I don't have barbecue beef ribs all the time. I trying to save it for holidays and stuff like that to keep it special.  No matter what kind of diet I'm on it always goes out the window when I see some barbecue beef ribs.

Now let's just say that my love for beef ribs comes with some uncomfortable consequences. I do believe that beef ribs loves me as much as I love them but beef ribs do something on my digestive track. They don't treat me as good as I treat them. And yet when I see a plate of beef ribs I just get weak and I eat. I don't even feel bad about it until later on that day. My digestive system will be cussing me out and in pain. I'm feeling a certain kind of way about beef ribs.

Why am I going on like this? Because someone else's beef ribs is a man or a woman. And somebody might need help figuring out how to stay strong in front of the disrespectful, ungrateful, wishy washy, push pull person who is causing you to feel uncomfortable, broken hearted and bamboozled. 

Now how can I stay strong in front of my weakness.

That's the stuff that gets you really down to your guts about yourself love. Talking about creating an inner conflict. Something that feels good that hurts you. Something you really truly love that hurts you. Someone that you would go through a lot of things to have in front of you only to be hurt by that person. 

Everybody's version of love is not the same and it is our responsibility to be extremely familiar with ourselves in order to maintain our self love, no matter how much we want the other person to honor our own personal self love. And that's the feeling that needs to be put above all others. 

It's not about focusing on the pain. Or about how bad the person treated you. It's about staying in tune with the love of self and how much you are willing to compromise your personal love boundaries. 

We are tasked to love ourselves more every time we sit in front of a plate of beef ribs. We need to love ourselves more than we did the last time we sat in front of that plate.

There's the test. Will you pass it? How do you pass it? Where's the study guide? What happened to some practice quizzes? 

You pass the test every time you remember who you are and stand in your boundaries. That comes with everyday nurturing of self. Because you might get hit with a pop quiz to see if your every day practice of self love is working.

To give you a hint on when you might get a pop quiz, pay attention to when you are feeling hungry and not just any regular hungry but, somewhat of a desperate hungry; a longing hunger where you just want to eat anything.  That's most likely the time when you need to love yourself even extra. This requires you to stay very in tuned with your spirit and heart. So when that pop quiz comes as a dinner invitation to your vegetarian friends who just happened to make a special dish of beef ribs for you, you will be able to make a full turn around. Leave the ribs alone.

LETTING THE GOOD TIMES ROLL

I was writing in my journal today, trying to figure out why I keep going through these ups and downs. I am not talking about the ups and downs of life in general. I am talking about my mindset that creates some of these ups and downs for myself. Follow me on this...

There have been times in my life when I have done all that I knew I could do to make a situation work and all I ended up doing was running in a circle or pounding my head against the wall. Why did I keep doing that? I was not in "flow" with my spirit.

I noticed a pattern in my life. The pattern is that when I hit bottom I stop and start praying daily; I do my meditations; I eat right; I get on top of my household duties; I even start paying attention to my bills and I make sure I have a routine that is productive.  As soon as these things start moving in a positive direction, I add more to my plate or take on a "project" that just happens to take much more of my time and I slowly stop doing those things that were working for me until I am at bottom again.  My darn ego takes over and says, "I got this."  And I fall right in line and believe "I got this."  Well, no wonder this becomes a cycle of ups and downs.

GREAT!!!!  Now I have all the answers, right?!?

Sure, but answers without the dedication to action are just a placebo and another way of saying "I got this" and ain't doing sh!t but setting myself up for another f&ck up.

Ok, so now I have the dedication to action, what will it take to actually "be" in action?

     1. Do a realistic assessment of what I am willing to do?

• Am I going to wake up an hour early to pray and meditate?
• Am I going to cook healthier food at a reasonable hour?
• Am I going to do morning/evening stretches or exercise?
• Am I going to stay on top of my bills; create a schedule for doing the bills?
• AND HOW BAD DO I WANT TO DO THESE THINGS

This assessment is not an easy thing if I am going to be true to myself, because I really don't want to do any of this.  The word "schedule" means bondage to me and I am a free spirit who will NOT be put in bondage!!!! I just want to heal people, wake up when I want to and let everything else just take care of itself.  So, the "HOW BAD DO I WANT IT?" question has to be considered...  What Am I Willing To Do to make this "change" be a consistency in my life when the only consistent thing in my life is inconsistency?

I know that, for me, the decision has to be made from a place of pleasure.  If I feel in anyway that I am doing this to runaway from pain, then I will only end up finding pain.  So what is the pleasure I get from doing all of those things listed above?  Hmm....  I would actually have some order in my life.  I would be living the life that I THINK I live (in my head) in reality.  In other words, the life I think I live would be the life I am ACTUALLY living.  Now, I just happen to find pleasure in actually living the life I think I am living.  That is something that I am willing to make the necessary adjustments to my life and dedicate myself to. 

     2. What fears, concerns, situations, thinking patterns or issues have interfered with me in the past?

• Arrogance
• Pride
• Stubborness
• Wonder Woman Syndrome: I can do all things at once.  There is nothing I can't do right this mi nute.
• Procrastination by Busyness: Staying so busy that I can't get to the things that I have worked for me; the things on the list above.
• "I have to know all the scenarios and outcomes before I get started" or "I have to do this or that before I can get started" or "It has to look a certain way"  blah blah
• "I don't have the money to do that" or any other kind of money conversation
• "My house is not big enough to do what I really want to do" - focusing on the problem and not even trying to come up with a solution
• FEAR of:
• Success:
• it is easier to not succeed at all then to succeed and fail.
• success brings a whole lot of unexpected expectations and responsibilities
• success has a definition that is very arbitrary and sometimes I get confused on what it actually means to be successful.  It becomes easy for me to doubt my personal success when someone else feels that I could have done better or questions whether I have succeeded in the end result.
• It is important for ME to set my definition on what success is for me and stay dedicated to MY definition!
• Failure:
• if I fail then I am not worth anything
• if I fail then I will let people, including myself, down
• Loosing everything:
• my reputation
• my material items
• my family's love and respect
• The Unknown, The Unexpected:
• "I don't know anyone who has succeeded in this" or "The risk is too high"  or "There are no proven reports that this works"  or "That may have worked for them, but I have never tried it so it wont work for me"
• EXPECTATIONS
• This one is a tricky one because I want to have some sort of expectation on how this is going to end up.  However, if I mix the expectations with desire then I have created a situation that can make my decisions put me in an undesirable situation.
• Expectations can lead to being closed to any other possibility.
• It can also lead to not hearing the intention behind what people are saying because I have created an expectation of what and how I want them to respond.  If they do not respond the way I expected then I am upset.  But if I leave myself open to whatever response they give me as being okay with me then I will be able to properly handle what they have said.
• Also, expectations can create a "SUPPOSED TO" perception.  "It's supposed to be this way or that way."  This doesn't work very well if you are doing something new to me because, my "supposed to" may not be the same as what someone else experienced and now I have closed myself to another possibly great opportunity.

I think I will stop with that question at this point because this list could end up requiring a psychologist if I keep going, lol.

The next course of action for me to take would be:

     3. Putting my plan on paper

• Write it in pencil
• Make a realistic schedule or time frame that I can live with and that has flexibility
• Start slow and incorporate something new every week
• Make realistic timelines or goals
• Give myself markers for assessing my progress
• and be honest with myself (without condemnation or beating myself up!)

     4. START THE PLAN!

Wow, all of this looks really good.  Kinda surprised it came from me, lol.  This looks like something that I can do.  When do I start?  Dang it, yesterday is gone and tomorrow hasn't come yet.  It looks like I only have today to start then.

MY SPIRITUAL FLOW STARTS NOW IN THIS EVER PRESENT MOMENT OF NOW!!!!

LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL!!!!  

INTRODUCTION

Hello.  Welcome to my world.  I am Lani Pounds, and I was told that some people might be interested in my natural living insights. Of course I didn't think I had anything new to add to what is already out there and really had no intentions of trying to recreate the wheel.  However, I met two very lovely young ladies that said otherwise. So here is my attempt at sharing my ideas, insights, research, blah, and blah.  I am a self-proclaimed hippy naturalist.  My late husband gave me that title and I wear it with pride.  I cannot really say what this blog will look like or what specific topics I will be covering.  That seems like too much stress.  I will say that the format will be extremely casual and not very "politically correct".  Here are some basic beliefs on where I am coming from:

1.  The Creator is in control of everything
2.  Everything is possible
3.  We know our bodies better than anyone else
4.  What we believe helps to create our reality
5.  There are some fundamental basics that govern how our bodies, minds and spirits work
6.  Words have power
7.  There are two "suppose to's":  Death and Change
8.  Flow (this word will be used a heck of a lot, my apologies in advance)

I am sure there are more, but these are the basics so far.

OK. Here is the my beginning (and remember that I did say these are my ramblings, so if it gets to long for you, I did warn you.)

I was working some job and I did not want to go into work.  I started plotting what I could do to get off for the day.  I finally decided to say I didn't feel too well.  I thought on this for about a good 15 minutes; deciding what "sickness" I had and how to make myself sound sick.  When I had the scene in my head, I called the job and said I was not coming to work.  Of course, with all of that preparation I was very convincing and got the day off.  Great, what was I going to do with my day.  I laid down and went back to sleep thinking about the imaginary illness I created.  By the time I woke up a few hours later, I was not feeling too good.  Why did I start off my first blog with this scenario?  To point out the power of our minds.  To shine light on the power of our words and beliefs.

What does this have to do with healthy, natural living?  This is the foundation to all healing.  If we cannot get our minds in the proper place for healing/natural living then all of my words will be useless.  I would be wasting my time and yours.  If you cannot remember any circumstances in your life where some form of the above example has worked for you, then look up the "Placebo Effect".  In short: it is like giving someone a sugar pill and they believe it will work and it does.

Before I can get into the different herbs, oils, and stuff, I need to know that you are having an accepting understanding of the power of your mind, beliefs, and judgments (suppose too's).  Some of the information I have to share goes against what "they" say is appropriate for us and if you are not open to hearing another point of view and actually chewing on it for a little while to see if it fits you and your lifestyle then again, I will be wasting my time and yours.

I am not saying to let go of all of the things that you believe in your life.  That would be asking you to destroy your foundation.  I am saying that your foundation could be expanded if you are willing to look objectively at the world around you and the world inside of you.  The American foundation is that we work and work until the job gets done and then we rest.  Several other countries foundation is that they work, rest, work and then go home.  We Americans say that we would love to take a rest in the middle of the day.  We come up with a whole lot of extra blah to justify that working all day is the "right" way to live.  I will ask you to look at nature, the animals and babies.  Nature rest, animals rest and so do babies.  So, can you expand your foundation to consider that resting during the day may be beneficial to your body?  As we go on this blogging journey together I ask that you be willing to expand your foundation and so will I.  I ask that you check your preconceived judgments, beliefs and suppose too's at the door.  First of all these beliefs that we hold onto as "truth" often hinders The Creator as He is trying to bless us, speak to us, enlighten us, answer questions for us, and the list goes on.  I am assuming that whoever you believe created this universe or has power over your life is powerful enough to effect changes in your life.  That said, when we come up with these beliefs that "that herb wont work", "the doctor said I can't use herbs", "that herbal stuff is ok for a cold or something, but I have cancer so I have to do what the doctor says", "herbs are not strong enough to handle the disease I have", "this chick don't know what the heck she is talking about" and the list goes on, we limit The Creator to be most effective in our lives.  I mean how would you feel if you heard someone saying that you aren't going to repay your debt just as you were about to give them the money.  Or imagine how sick I felt when my aunt told me that I could not have those skates I really wanted (that she had already bought) when she found out the mean things I said about her.

Our words come from our beliefs and are based on our suppose too's.  Our suppose too's start to get planted in us in our homes.  We have several different cultural influences that shape our beliefs.  One town does things different than the next.  One city does things different then the next, etc. So we have an North American culture, a state culture, a city culture, a town culture, a community culture, racial culture, a family culture and finally a home culture.  All of these play a role on how we determine what to believe and how to live.  Are these cultures cultivating lifestyles that promote wellness for its people?  Hmmmm.

This is getting ready to get a little winded.  I hope you are getting where I am coming from; are your suppose too's keeping you from optimal health?

EXPAND YOUR FOUNDATION!

My hidden truth

I had to stop the other day and ask myself, "why am I going through this same thing all over again?"  

"Why do I say I want to be healthy every time I feel pain, but go right back to doing the same things once I feel better?" (my answer to this: it is just too much work; I actually like pastrami sandwiches and beef ribs and I ain't trying to stop what I like)

"Why do I have ALL of this knowledge and use none of it on myself?" (my answer to this: it is just too much work; or I will get to it later; or I will be okay for now; just let me finish this and I will start working on myself tomorrow)

"What is the deal where I have been on this "Feast or Famine" financial roller coaster?" (my answer to this: God will provide, He has an unlimited supply, so I can spend my money on what I want...lol, until what I need (like electricity, water, etc.) gets compromised)

I knew the answers where there, but I felt like it was something blocking me from seeing the truth, my truth.  The block was me!  All of the "answers" I have been telling myself got me in this circular spiral of UPs and DOWNs.  I realized I have a set of beliefs that are driving my actions.  No matter how many affirmations, strong prayers or pleadings to God for help, I was subconsciously setting myself up for this roller coaster.

As I am writing this I hear the child in me screaming that it doesn't want to go to bed early or find time in the day to spend on myself.  THAT'S JUST TOO MUCH WORK!  THAT'S JUST TOO MUCH WORK! lol

Since I spoil most people in my circle, it is not surprising that I spoil the child in me as well.  What do you do with a child when they go from spoiled to spoiled rotten?  You gotta put your foot down, close your ears and do some tough love.  You know she will thank you later.

My hidden truth is that the child in me has been running my life, with my permission (consciously or subconsciously, doesn't matter).  

OK...so what am I going to do about it?

Me and the little child will sit down and have a very personal conversation about the ideas, beliefs and dreams the little child has.  That will be the start of understanding some of my actions that keep me on the roller coaster.  The next step to dealing with my truth is to take action towards living a life that is loving to both of us (getting proper rest, eating live food, putting positive images through my eyes and in my mind, etc.).  I also understand that I need to give that little child in me some attention and some love, so that will mean quiet personal time with myself.  I will spend more time in my spiritual journey so that I may strengthen the both of us with the help of God.

This is my truth, the answers to changing the "Feast or Famine" roller coaster ride that has been my life.  If you resonant towards this, please use it for yourself and leave a comment on how it worked for you.

Expand Your Foundation.

Letting Go

Today I had to realize that it was time to let go and move on.  It didn't feel good at all and I had to allow myself to mourn the dreams of the future and appreciate the journey of the past.  I had to remind myself that the only constant thing in this universe is change and that those dreams I had of the future were nice for that time.  Dreams change as situations change. Stress becomes a part of life when we resist the flow of the change we find ourselves swimming against the tide.  If we live our lives where we are truly trusting the Creator to guide us then we will realize that the river is flowing to bigger and better with every change and not have a problem with following the flow.  The lesson to learn is stay in contact with your spirit so that you will flow easier with change.

Stress - The WTF Factor

The definition of stress: When Your Mind Overrides Your Body's Natural Instinct To Slap The S#!t Out Of Someone.

Since the last time I talked to you guys I put one child in college and the other in private school. I also started to revamp my extreme couponing habit while finishing some work around my house. In the midst of all of this, that man with the fishing pole from that Geico commercial had been dangling money in front of my saying, "You got to try a little harder than that," every time I reached for a dollar. So what do you do when you become stressed the _____ out, and you want to stay on this side of the jail house?

We have all heard of prayer, meditation, quiet time, etc. but what do we do about it? Usually nothing. I have heard plenty of people talk about all of the stuff they HAVE to do. If they don't do it the WHOLE world comes to an end. REALLY? When did you become God? When did you get this control over the things that go on in this world, let alone the spiritual world where everything takes place first?

Look guys, EXPAND YOUR FOUNDATION! Stress is a misconceived perception that we have created and we have literally put ourselves in torment. Talking about hell on earth, just think about what you go through when you leave out of the house without your cell phone. Self inflicted Torment!

What is the point in me telling you to take some KAVA KAVA to help stay calm or some ST. JOHN'S WORT to maintain a sunny disposition if you are not going to stop. When your car shows signs of overheating you slow down and let it cool off. When your car gets low on fuel you stop and fill it up. But when you get overheated do you stop? Do you fill your body up with fuel when it gets low?  Please STOP THE MADNESS!

Grown folks will find a way to get what ever done they need to get done if you say no. Your children do not run your world, you run theirs. You can't make grown folks do right, remember the people who spent 40 years in the desert, and that was God who was dealing with them. You are not responsible for making people happy; that is God's job, stay in your lane. Some people will be mad at you no matter what you do, so just do you.  You can't change stupid people (or am I supposed to say people who do stupid things, lol). Material things burn up in fires, get stolen, get broken or simple wear down. Refocus on what is truly worth your precious energy.

So here it goes, my challenge to you for the next month, 30 days:

1. Tell someone "no" who you ALWAYS say yes to at least once a week
2. Take 15 minutes a day to sit outside, take your shoes off, make contact with the earth with your feet and do nothing. This is not prayer time or meditation time. This is your transition, recharge yourself, brush off the crap time.
3. Come up with 3 dreams, goals, activities, etc if money was not an issue, just write them down. Remember what it is to use your imagination. Remember how you used to day dream. Allow your mind to travel as far as you can take it
4. Clean up one major thing a week
5. Take a daily dose of a calming herb: kava kava, skullcap, wormwood, yerba santa, wild lettuce, etc
6. Pray, meditate, have an intimate CONVERSATION with your Creator. Have quality time together. You know, act like your Creator is more than just a grocery list provider and sit and enjoy Him
7. Do one thing a week that is fun to you and it has to take you out of your comfort zone. Do it scared, nervous, whatever, just do it
8. Choose 3 days out of each week that you are going to "love on purpose". This means that you are going to show an effort to love someone who does not deserve to be loved on at that time and you are going to do it for the whole day to people who come into your life; the crazy driver, the rude clerk, the annoying coworkers, those things your significant other does, and those spoiled children/teenagers that you created. Even if it is yourself that you need to show some "on purpose" love to
9. Use one day out of each week to look back through your entire life and find one person who you still have not forgiven and forgive them. You don't have you tell them. Just come to a peaceful place that this horrible thing happened, they were 100% wrong for what they did, some of them don't deserve to be breathing right now, but you are still breathing and you are still standing in spite of their wrong doing, so they really didn't win and you are going to accept that as your truth. Oh and add some special forgiveness for yourself for whatever reason you need to forgive yourself
10. Be honest with yourself and with others. This is not a license to go off on people, there is a way to say what you feel that will lessen the hurt your "honesty" may cause. Now this gets tricky because honesty can come back to you. Choose wisely or keep your mouth closed, your honesty is only YOUR honesty and if someone is not ready for it you become a butthole. Being honest with yourself includes, but not limited to: yes, your poop stinks; the roads are not made for only you; if everyone else around you is messing up, maybe you are the one with the problem; your are not perfect; perfection is a lie; everyone else does NOT think like you and cannot read your mind; there is only 1 supposed to in life and that is that you are going die, EVERYTHING else is extra so stop tripping and stop putting your tripping on other people. OK, I got a little carried away

Please keep this easy. My goal is not to create something else for you to stress over. If you decide to do this, understand that you may experience some extra opposition. Keep this exercise to yourself when you start and during the 30 days you are distressing your life.  You may find it helpful to journal your experiences on paper, video or voice recording.  Let me know how your next 30 days to a less stressful life turns out.

EXPAND YOUR FOUNDATION. PEACE

I Like Smoking...My New Journey

I am sitting here looking through my herb books and going through the many natural websites that deal with stopping smoking and it really all sounds like a bunch of yada yada.  Most people know all of this and yet they still smoke. What can I add to your world that is not just: take this herb, drink some water and you are all good?  So I am not going to do that. I am going to just tell my story and send out hope that it helps you in your world.

First of all let me say that I like smoking. Even when I started breaking out from Marlboros I just switched to the Native American brand and when those started breaking me out I switched to cloves.  I was not going to let a little break out stop me from smoking; I am a strong woman.

While all of these herbal books and websites address what smoking does to the body, nobody could ever really address how to leave these "smokers habits."  For me, smoking was not just puffing on a stick. Smokers have their own social world that non-smokers know nothing about. I have met people while taking a smoking break that I would never had met otherwise. A smoke break means walking out of the current situation and into a space of clearness. Going outside away from whatever madness that is happening let's me take another look at what is going on. And the funny thing is that nobody really bothers me when I am smoking. I think this is the main reason why I like to smoke. It is an acceptable escape.

I also like chewing on things; pencils and pens have no chance around me when I am not smoking. While I sit typing, reading or writing, my hand reaches for a smoke. I think I smoke more when I am working then playing. So it is also this habit that I have to address. What do I chew on now?

Well, since I have all of this herbal knowledge I decided to make my own herbal cigarettes and sell them.  This went great for a while, and I had a growing customer base, but I got scared. Yes, I did. I got scared of the big tobacco companies and the government.  When I would smoke my herbal blends people thought I was smoking weed. If it doesn't smell like cigarettes then it must be weed, right? I did not need any unwanted attention from the authorities, so I stopped.  I AIN'T SCARED NO MORE!


I am at the point now where I see cigarettes as bondage. I am being controlled by this little stick thing and I don't really like being addicted to something.  Instead of having a friend or family member try this out, I am going to be my own guinea pig. I have decided when I finish this pack of cigarettes that I just bought I will put my plan into motion.  It should take about a week for me to have everything in place to start. I will keep you guys posted on my progress and try to be short about it. Here is my plan:

1. Chew on licorice sticks
2. Smoke my herbal blends of cigarettes
3. Take purposeful breaks outside for fresh air
4. Drink plenty of water since this will help get the nicotine out of my body because nicotine is water soluble
5. Might try the e-cigs since I make the vape oils or buy some vape oils that are nicotine free
6. Use herbs and oils

• sniff Black Pepper Essential Oils to help with the cravings
• sniff Lavender Essential Oil to help with nerves
• use drops of Lobelia extract to help with the nicotine, Lobelia goes into the nicotine receptors in our bodies
• use calming herbal extracts: kava kava, st. john's wort or create my own blend

After about 3-4 weeks of maintaining so that I can get a handle on the habit of smoking I will start the detox process (of course herbal):

• colon cleanse to prepare the way for the kidney, liver and lung flush/cleanse
• kidney flush: nicotine is water soluble
• liver flush: left over nicotine gets stored in fat
• lung cleanse: built up mucus needs to be cleared out and the lungs rebuilt

Well, that is the plan. Let you know how it goes in next week.

PEACE.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY

This post is dedicated to Men.  I was watching the movie Black Dynamite and I realized that some men would rather die than to have a little love stick.  (Yes, I do know the technical terms for these words, I am just in the mood to keep it teenage friendly, so work with me.)  This is going to be the topic for today and I will start with the mind.

I first have to say that I am not a man.  I do not want to be a man.  I have not walked on this earth as a man.  I do love and respect our men.  I love Angie Stone's song Brotha.  She says it all for me.  Having a son has opened my eyes to some of the challenges men go through and how some of those challenges are brought on by us women who do not understand the power that we have.  Because I want my son to become a respectful, loving man and husband, I have had to look at men in a different way. 

I always thought that men were strong and kind.  They did not have feelings that could get hurt.  You know, "man up", "men don't cry", and all of that.  Boy oh boy, that was a belief I had to get rid of with a quickness.  Given that, let’s talk about some of the issues that can effect a man’s love stick and maybe how to crank things up a notch.

Men, understand that the world has been telling you a bunch of lies.  You have been told that you should be able to stiffen up at just the sight of the woman’s pleasure box.  You have been told that all pleasure boxes are good pleasure boxes and it really doesn’t matter how you feel about the woman.  The truth is your feelings and emotions can affect your ability to perform.  They have been telling you a bunch of lies, lies, lies.  So please don’t beat yourself up (no pun intended) when you are not at the best of your performance level at every session.  What I do want you to do, is realize that because you may be feeling a certain way about your day, the job, the bills, this nagging woman at home, etc. your body will be effected as well.  For those of you who have been active in the bedroom arena, think back on your best sessions and on your worst.  I bet during your best sessions your mind was free and you were able to be the beast master in the bedroom.  And likewise on your worst session you had so much on your mind you were basically just going through the motions and really didn’t care if you or your partner crossed the finish line.  Now let’s take this a little deeper.

What happens when you have been in a long term relationship with the right person (only The Creator can help you if you are with the wrong person)?  All of the crazy sessions have turned into “am I gonna even get to look at the pleasure box this week?” or “Man, that 20% over there (I think the new term is THOT) is starting to look like 60%.”  LOL…Chris Rock said to recycle the P.  Lol…but first you may need to recycle your mindset.  You have been with this woman long enough to know how to get passed her drama and get into the pleasure box.  Give yourselves a commitment to have a weekend together every three months.  You need this to recharge yourself and to get the extra conversation out of your minds for a while.  It doesn’t have to be extravagant; a weekend in the local hotel will work just as well as sending the kids away and spending the weekend with the phone off and the legs in the air.  Both of you need to remember what is was like to be attractive again and to be wanted by your mate.  These weekends help keep that burning.  If you are one of those types of guys who has a hard time letting go of the thoughts of providing, the job, the bills, etc. please find you a relaxing herb for this special occasion.  FREE YOUR MIND AND THE REST WILL FOLLOW! 

If you are in pretty good shape and you find that the love stick has turned into a love noodle, it may not be something physical with you; it may be that your partner has hurt you so much or messed with your emotions in such a negative way that you are simply no longer physically attracted to her.  You might be fooling yourself, but as they say the love stick has a mind of it’s own sometimes.  And it is not trying to mind your partner anymore.  That said, do some deep work and a little percolating on when the love stick rises to the occasion.  If you get a rise watching a porno, a girl walking down the street or any other situation, your love stick works just fine.  It is mental.  GREAT!….You don’t have to take a bullet.  All you have to do now is some mind work, get rid of that chick or recycle the pleasure box.  Do what feels right for you and please stay true.  Don’t use this as an excuse to be mean or it will not work. 

Now, for those with diabetes, high blood pressure, a physical issues or on pharmaceuticals, there are herbal ways to help with this.  You have to do more mental work of course because of the thoughts and feelings that come with your body not performing the way you want it.  The rest of this blog will have a few herbs and tricks to help in this area.

Without beating a dead horse, I must mention first, that a cleanse of the kidney, liver, colon and lungs for those who need that, should be done with the help of an experienced practitioner.  Remember that we are talking about blood flow and circulation as well as hormonal balance.  If you want a faster response, these things need to be cleaned out, especially the blood.  I am sure you have heard this before and know of ways to do this.  If not let me know and we can go over some plans specifically for you. 

USE THE KNOWLEDGE OF YOUR BODY TO DETERMINE HOW MUCH AN HERB TO TAKE AND WHICH HERB YOU THINK WILL WORK FOR YOU.  LISTEN TO YOUR FIRST MIND. 

Click on the highlighted words to see a website with more detailed information.

Calming Herbs:

• Medical Marijuana:  if you live in a state where this is legal, then get some and stop tripping.  I am sure I don’t need to go into details of its calming effects.  For medicinal purpose I believe the edible form is best and last longer.  Please be cautious on edibles because they will sneak up on you.  They can take anywhere from 30 minutes to 4 hours before you feel anything.  The kick is totally based on the individuals digestion system.  I would like to mention that it has a lot of healing power if you get the strands that are higher in CBD than in THC.
  
• Kava Kava Root:  not to be taken with alcohol, anti-depressants, dopamine drugs.  This herb has been used for centuries in the South Pacific.  This herb produces a calming in the brain and is not addictive.  Some suggest taking 250 mg of kavalactones per day, three days per week taking a week off after a month.
• Ashwagandha:  Ashwagandha is an Indian herb used for ongoing chronic stress. Ashwagandha root rejuvenates without being over stimulating.  Suggested dosages range from 300mg-6000mg per day divided into three dosages. 

• St. John’s Wort:  Used to treat sleep disorders, depression and anxiety for centuries.  Suggested dosages range from 300mg to 1,800mg broken into two-three daily dosages.      

Testosterone Herbs:

this is a very short list of a very long herb class.  My three favorites for now.

• Fo-Ti Root:  Also known as He sho wu, ho shou wu and other names in China.  Again this is an herb that has been used for centuries for increasing energy, longevity, and fertility.  Suggested dosages range from 3g to 18g per day divided into three dosages.
       
• Maca Root: A form of ginseng, this root has been known to increase stamina, libido, and sperm production.  I got one of my husbands to try this herb and he experienced a very powerful release.  And he didn’t need to take the herb for three months before he had results.  I think it was only a day or two.  Suggested dosages range from 1500mg-2400mg per day divided into three dosages. 
  
• Tribulis Terrestris:  An herb from India it has been used as an aphrodisiac and to increase testosterone levels.  Suggested dosages range from 400mg-2,000mg per day divided into three dosages.

For those with pre-existing health issues, these herbs may take a few weeks before results will be noticeable.  Since your body will be in a place of lack it will take a minute for the lack to be satisfied and the extra benefits from the herbs will be noticed. 

I make several blends for hormonal balance for my clients if you are interested in some of the results and would like to know more about these blends, let me know.  I also have a few books - the G Spot Massage, Healing with Sexual Energy, and a couple of Penis Enlargement books - on the Books page of this blog.

FUN THINGS

Now if you have certain beliefs, like missionary position is the only way to reach the finish line then you are putting yourself in sexual bondage, and not the fun kind.  Every part of your skin has nerves attached to it and if touched properly, these nerves can make your toes crinkle.  Expand Your Foundation to ALL of the possibilities in the bedroom.  Create an environment of freedom.  Leave the judgements on the other side of the door.  If you are not ready to do that, please don't read the rest of this.  You will be wasting your time and calling me freaky, lol.

• Vibrators:  Some of you may be familiar with using vibrators on your partner, but I am telling you that they can be used on you as well.  Allow your TRUSTED partner to place the vibrator on that spot right below the sac, at the base of the love stick while she is going for a ride.  Or have her place the vibrator on her check while she is licking the big stick.  Use your imagination.  You can have vibratorial fun too.
• Food:  Honey, cool-whip, caramel, etc. can all be placed on, around, and in between the love stick, chest, back of knees, basically whatever turns you on.  Frozen fruits can be quite pleasurable.  Just imagine what it would feel like going into a pleasure box that has ice chips or frozen cherries. This is a new meaning to busting a cherry.  What a wonderful time to go on an expedition of sensual pleasures.

• Fantasy/Dress-Up:  This one is open for all interpretations.  You must create a freedom in the bedroom for this to be pleasurable.  Do a strip tease dance for her and maybe she will ride your pole when you are done.  Let her come home to a clean house and seduce her before she can even put her purse down.  I think you can figure out other things that might work for you.

I think that will do for now.  The marriage bed shall not be defiled.  What you do in the privacy of your bed with your wife is all good.  Judgment Free, Guilt Free, and God Blessed.  I LOVE MARRIAGE....oops, got a little carried away.  Now it is your turn!!!

Have fun exploring the new ways your love stick can fulfill the pleasure box.

PEACE.

ALABAMA SB326 MEDICAL MARIJUANA BILL

This is the medical marijuana bill that has been "Indefinitely Postponed" as of June 3, 2015.  I am not a very political person.  I will admit I do not have too much faith in the nature of man when power and money are involved.  I tend to shy away from publicly speaking on these matters, but I just couldn't be quiet on this one.  Here is my vent:

First of all I moved here in Jefferson County, Alabama in 2008.  I didn't know anything about a sewer bill or that these crooks stole money.  I didn't have anything to do with putting them in office or getting them out.  But yet, I am now paying almost double my water bill because someone stole money and we/I have to help pay it back.  So the crooks don't pay it back, I have to pay it back.  Come on, really.  Now I sit and look at California, who was paying their state employees with IOU's because they were in such bad financial shape.  They are not having that issue any more since medical marijuana has become legal.  I think Colorado is making BILLIONS of dollars on its open marijuana sales.  So I was excited when I heard that Alabama has approved Carly's Law for the use of marijuana oil.  Then I read the fine print.  Basically someone who had a need knew someone in the legislation and paid them off to create this "Law" so that they can legally use this product.  The Law is a joke.  It only helps those with one kind of disease, you can only get it at one hospital in the whole state and it doesn't even protect the doctor's license who prescribes the oil.  This was clearly an inside job.  They could not even hide it.  REALLY Alabama. 

Okay fine, here comes Mr. Singleton who creates this wonderful bill SB326 (of course I think he doesn't need to allot so much to the cops, but go ahead and pay them off, lol).  This bill not only creates a new market for new jobs and opportunities for the communities, it truly allows for healing of sick people with the use of this wonderful herb.  Now, what kind of gangsters are these state senators if they can't even figure out how to play this game and get paid well.  Why settle for the chump change that you have been getting?  Here is an opportunity to get a gazillion dollars on the side, the state and local municipalities can prosper, and the citizens of the state can be healed.  Having people in your community who are well, means that the workforce is able and viable. To me this is a no brainer.  REALLY, Alabama, come on.  If a stay-at-home mom can figure this out, what is your problem.  Y'all are the big-time gangsters, you should have had this in motion long ago. 

Let's take a look at our history.  Marijuana was used a whole lot in the past.  The cotton industry decided that the herb hemp (hemp is a cannabis herb) was threatening their cash flow so they did a big campaign to make it illegal.  If you look at most of the research that is out there about marijuana you will be hard pressed to find true evidence that this herb is harmful to us.  The chemicals that are in tobacco are more harmful than what is in marijuana but the tobacco industry will not allow cigarettes to be made illegal.  I did a search for the medical benefits of tobacco and marijuana and found that marijuana far outweighs tobacco.  I did a little research on marijuana and pregnancy  (this link has other references at the end of the article) and found out that the most of these pregnant women who were surveyed smoked cigarettes as well as marijuana.  The researchers attributed low birth weight to the tobacco use and not the marijuana use.  That is just one example of the backwards thinking that this world infects it's people with.  And we believe this stuff.  We believe that marijuana is bad for you because they made it illegal.  The people who say, "I don't want that stuff in my system"  will turn around and pop a loratab (maybe three or four of them) and deal with the side effects of that drug.  Backwards thinking again.  EXPAND YOUR FOUNDATION!

I am going to say a little bit about the religious aspect of this since this is the bible belt.  If we believe that God created the plants on this earth for our benefit and some for our protection from predators, then we have to give Him credit for this herb as well.  When you look at all of the healing benefits from marijuana how can you think that God does not want us to use it for healing?  I am not talking about just sitting around smoking in excess.  God is about balance.  I am talking about the medicinal use of the herb.  The argument that God doesn't want us to use things that alter our minds, needs to be referenced to the bible.  Also, if you use prozac you are altering your mind.  But because "they" say it is legal we take it to alter our minds.  Backwards thinking once more.

I don't know who to tell you to talk to in order to effect a change in this policy.  I don't know who hands to grease in order to make this bill a reality.  I don't even know if calling our state representatives will be enough.  I cannot begin to imagine what would be the proper incentive to get these people to think about the people who put them in office rather than thinking about how they can get paid on this deal. 

Peace and stay true.